What to Expect at Premarital Counseling After Quarantine

A Different Approach

The premarital counselor you choose to work with after the pandemic will probably approach your sessions very differently than they would have before it. They know that the pandemic has created challenges for everyone, whether married, in a long-term relationship, single, or engaged.

As you may have experienced personally, the extended lockdowns created an environment ripe for frustration, stress, and emotional disruption. Likewise, spending so much time together may have made you aware of pesky habits held by your partner that aren’t so endearing.

In light of this, your counselor may approach your sessions less from a premarital approach and more from the approach they would use with couples who’ve been married for some time.

Deep Re-Evaluation

If you’ve just trudged through a year of quarantine together, you’re probably exhausted. Everyone is.

All this time together and stress from job loss, health scares, and financial upheaval can wreak havoc on a relationship. Times like these can show what an individual — and a relationship — is really made of.

Depending on what issues each of you brings up in your first one or two premarital sessions, your therapist may want to help you do some deep re-evaluations of your relationship. You may not be as confident of your commitment to each other as you were before the pandemic. If you’re having doubts, now is the time to re-evaluate with the help of a professional.

While different than divorce counseling, your therapist will be able to help you walk through the issues that may be making you hesitate about marriage.

Communication and Stress Management Assessment

Again, few things can make you aware of each other’s communication styles and ability to handle stress as a pandemic can. The chances are that you learned both good and bad things about yourself and your fiancé.

Unfortunately, being cooped up together for months on end is different than “normal” life. Before the pandemic, if you were married, you’d still have time apart at work. You’d be able to spend time with friends, travel, and escape the confines of your home and workaday life. You’d also have more avenues on hand for stress management.

So you can likely expect your therapist to help you investigate and unpack the communication issues that came up during quarantine. Are there long-term communication issues that are serious, or are they ones that are likely to resolve themselves naturally once life regains normalcy? Does either of you need help learning how to manage stress more healthily?

These are important issues to work through.

—

One of the goals of premarital counseling after quarantine is to help you build a good foundation for your years together as a married couple. For good or bad, you can think of the pandemic as a litmus test for your relationship.

As experienced couples counselors, we can help you evaluate as you move forward with your relationship. Please reach out to our office today or visit our Couples & Marriage Counseling page to learn more.